On Valentine’s Day, We can Buy Ourselves Flowers
Valentine’s Day is here! For some, this is a happily anticipated day as one may look forward to intentionally recognizing and celebrating their romantic love with another. If that’s you, great! For others, Valentine’s Day may feel neutral – simply another day that will come and go. While for others, it may feel like a sore reminder of not having a desired relationship in your life. No matter how this day lands with you, you are not alone.
Regardless of your relationship status on Valentine’s Day, we can celebrate a relationship that is here now and will remain: the relationship with ourselves. Whether you are married, coupled, single – the relationship that we have with ourselves is here to stay so why not treat it right? Valentine’s Day can be a day of celebrating yourself, all that you do, and showing yourself some love!
Can We buy Ourselves flowers to celebrate self-love? Yes we Can. And maybe We should!
In the spirit of self-love, here are some holistic ideas about how we may approach Valentine’s Day:
Mindset
Before we buy ourselves flowers, let’s check-in with the mind because what we tell ourselves can make a significant difference. For example, one study compared two groups of females who were employed as hotel room attendants. Females in one group were told that the work they did at the hotel was “good exercise,” while females in the other group were not given that information. Results of the study showed that women who were told that their work was “good exercise” lost more weight and experienced greater reductions in blood pressure and body-fat percentage when compared to the women who were not told that their work was good exercise (Crum & Langer, 2007).
What is your mindset about your relationship status? Does it feel permanent? Perhaps you tell yourself “you’ll be happy when….” Are thoughts critical or judgmental?
Depending on your mindset, maybe there is room for a shift. For example, could dating be seen as an adventure? Could a stressor within your relationship be seen as an opportunity for growth? Maybe recognizing all that you do for yourself is empowering? Perhaps using a warm and kind tone with yourself could go a long way.
The mindset that we have about some circumstances can potentially influence how we relate to and experience that circumstance.
Nurture Yourself
What would a self-love day be without some self-care? You likely do a lot for yourself – you could be showing up each day as a parent, employee, friend, partner, business owner, caretaker, you name it – and you’re probably showing up to more than two or three of these roles throughout a typical day.
How do you show yourself that you are loved, just as you show love to others?
What leaves you feeling physically, emotionally, and spiritually recharged?
Some ideas could be:
Making (or ordering) your favorite meal
Guilt-free rest
Break away to be in nature
Digital detox
Try something new and exciting
Buy yourself those flowers!
Share Your Love
We can engender the good feelings of love by sharing love. Love comes in many forms beyond romantic love and those can be rich resources. We can give and receive love to parents, friends, family, strangers, and our community, for example.
On this Valentine’s Day, you may share love with others. Some ideas include:
Coffee date with a friend
Overdue catch-up with a dear person
Volunteering
A small act of kindness
Offering a listening ear
Sharing your happiness through smiles
Today is a small snapshot in time. If you could fly above this moment in time to see a full perspective of your life – the many chapters that came before, the current time, and all that we hope is still to come – we could see how vast and constant change is.
No matter what this Valentine’s Day Brings, a broadened Perspective can give us the wisdom to know that things will change and there is opportunity for gratitude in today.
Let's Grow
If you would like to learn more about how to create the relationships you desire, including a compassionate relationship with yourself, reach out for a free 15-minute informational consultation. I want to support my clients on their personal growth journey toward greater self-love and fulfilling relationships.
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Reference:
Crum, A. J., & Langer, E. J. (2007). Mind-set matters: Exercise and the placebo effect. Psychological Science, 18, 165-171.
